Hi, I'm Ruth Baker. I was born, raised, and have lived my entire life in northern Indiana. My parents and maternal and paternal grandparents were also lifelong Hoosiers. So its needless to say that I was raised with a simple and conservative value system. I have always had a deep abiding need for God in my life and have wanted to find ways to express these feelings.
Perhaps, this came natural to me since my paternal grandfather, LeRoy Ooley, had a Damascus Road experience and became a Pentecostal preacher and evangelist. Although I always considered myself to be a Christian, there was a drastic turn of events in my life when I was 20 years old. I was called on by a Jehovah's Witness at my home. This initial event coupled with the facts that I didn't know doctrines (what I believed, why I believed it) or didn't know my Bible, made a perfect receipe for disaster. I soon started a Bible study which lasted almost two years. Then I became a full-fledged Jehovah Witness when I was baptized in May of 1968. I was a J.W. for twenty years.
Then I was so consumed with fear that I couldn't take it any more. This fear was in such contrast to the love that I thought God was, and how we should love God and others. I literally got up from bed one morning and expressed all these feeling out loud. I never went back to the Kingdom Hall, called any witness, or had any call from Jehovah's Witness.
But, although I had willingly physically removed myself from the organization, I thought that the problem originated and lay within myself. After all, that's what they continually tell you. I thought that perhaps maybe I could get my head on straight and get back on track because I felt condemned. I didn't. I wasn't there physically but the Society was still in my heart and in my head.
As a consequence, I spent 13 years in a spiritual wilderness: afraid to find God anywhere else since all other beliefs were supposed to be part of Satan's false religious system. I'd be condemned for sure then! It is hard to express the feelings I had of guilt, worthlessness, and condemnation for those 13 years. My spirituality suffered and was almost non-existent. Morals weakened, language became vulgar. The one positive thing I did was to become a non-traditional college student. I majored in history and accumulated 45 credit hours in history alone; my minor was sociology which I, for some reason, focused on American institutions--primarily religion.
After I received my B.A. degree my husband wanted me to help him with antiques and collectibles. So we did antique shows and opened an antique shop in 1999. At the same time I became a popular guest teacher at the local school system. Everything seemed to be going fine and I worried very little about my spiritual condition.
Then came an unexpected death of a brother-in-law which brought the realization to Jim and I that life is fragile. Another strange thing came as a result of this death. The brother-in law was a life-long resident of the community and was well known, ergo, the funeral home visitation was absolutely jam packed. We were asked to help visit with the people who waited long periods of time in line. One of the people was Mike Chilton. I didn't want to talk to him because he had been a scoundrel of the first degree and had dated my oldest daughter at one time. I made a remark to him and he showed up at our house a couple of days later. I told Jim that if he was like he used to be, I didn't think I wanted him around. Well, surprise, surprise! He wasn't like he used to be, he was now a born-again Christian. In fact, Jim saw such a change in him that he wanted to visit the church where Mike attended. I agreed to go because we wanted to do this thing together in case anything ever happened that we would need a support network. But I had no intention of ever getting involved in a religion again, and said so. Those are the words of a fool!
Everyone was so friendly. What's more, it was like God was pulling us in, drawing us. WE were so enthused about it . Then a short two weeks after our first visit to Mike's church, a series of disasters began to befall us. We received a 1 a.m. call on May 6, 2001, informing us that one of our grandsons was with some boys from the youth group (our family started going to church with us from the start) and they were in a bad car accident. According to the county, state, and local police from two towns is that "someone was watching over them" since, in their expert opinion, no one should've walked away from the accident alive. No serious injuries to anyone of them. The very same day, in the afternoon, another grandson was in an accident in which a go-cart threw him out and it landed on his back and could've killed him. He escaped with a cut down the inside of his leg, but no permanent or serious damage. Then on May 9th the grandson who lives with us was in a freak accident while in wrestling practice. He lost his short term memory and the neurologist tried to prepare us all that our grandson was not recovering as quickly as some do with this type of injury. At 2 a.m. on the 10th the doctor said that he would have to be put in the brain truama center if he wasn't better by 8 a.m. Mike got the church's prayer chain going. At 8 a.m. we called the hospital and my daughter said that he was the same as the night before. Preparing ourselves for the worst, we got ready to head back to South Bend. Miraculously, by the time we got to South Bend at 9 a.m., he had eaten some breakfast, was up and dressed, was preparing to be dismissed. A slight problem hung on for a while, but if you want to talk about a miracle and some heavy duty praising the Lord--we did.
We thought we could now breathe a sigh of relief after all that had happened in just a few short days. We thought that surely the disasters had passed. Then came that very next Sunday. It was May 13, 2001, and it happened to be Mother's Day.
After church the family was to go to my youngest daughter's house for dinner. It was a good day, at first, then it ended in tragedy. About 10 minutes after arriving at Tess' house she said that she wanted to take a quick spin on the ATV on the back area of their property. She revved the engine and took off. Soon my husband said that she had fallen off of the three wheeler. All that followed is too much to tell here. But, she was thrown 17 feet into the air and landed on her head. By the time that my husband got to her, which was about 1 block's distance, she was laying in a wash tub's size pool of her blood.
To make a long story short, she bled to death through her ears with bits of her brain coming out through her ears, also. I can't describe the pain, grief, and terrible sense of loss that we all felt. Tess was the catalyst of humor, fun, and wit in the family. Everyone confided in her, then she'd tell me what everyone else said. She left a wonderful husband and two children. I could fill a book about that day and the following days, really four years that followed that. But what is the most important aspect of all these tragedies is that all of these things were too much for one person to bear. You see I found God just in time. It was God's coming to us just in time--I feel now that He is not just an on time God, He's an all time God.
I never believed as a J.W. that God spoke or acted toward individuals anymore, but I was wrong. In the midst of the tragic death of my daughter, I had no where else to turn for comfort or peace. I called out to God one night--God answered me. He showed me things I hadn't known before. It was so amazing, and it wasn't the product of a grief stricken mother's mind, either. Like I said, I never expected God to answer. But he did! That very same night I pledged--I made a promise from the bottom of my heart-- that I would devote my entire life, my energy, and my praise to God. That I would never cease to proclaim His grace, mercy--well everything that God is.
My enthusiasm has not waned these seven years. These have not been easy years for us. I got the responsibilities for my father who had a heart attack and died; then for my home bound mother for 2 1/2 years; my husband had a stroke in his foot and short term memory; because of this last illness we had to sell every asset and item of value since he couldn't work for 6 months. In short we were completely broke with a mountain of medical bills. This is the down side, but I always proclaimed God's promises.
These were the results: I received healing of a heart condition that the Mayo clinic says there is no remedy for except surgery; the Lord led me to the proper attorney concerning my dad's affairs that he left in such a jumbled mess--I prayed and sought everyone I could to help in three counties and was told there was no help--then three, yes, three people who I did not know or didn't know each other told me where to go; my mother never liked me, but after 2 years of caring for her we became closer than I could ever imagine; three doctors said in two days time during Jim's stroke illness that he would lose part of his foot or perhaps even up to and including part of the leg. After anointing and prayers, he was healed without anything being done medically to cure him--the end result is all he lost was a little skin that peeled from one of his toes.
Concerning our financial devastation during this time, an occurrance made a turn of events for us which came from something that we hadn't even wanted. I had deeded my parents property away, but we wound up with it. We had to sell it because of the financial predicament we were in. Amazingly, it was sold at double the money that it had been appraised at--we were then totally debt free.
Some people might think that this is dramatized or that they were chance occurrances. I assure you that only a slight portion of these stories have been told on these pages. We did little or nothing to make these things happen or to manipulate the circumstances; in deed, almost all things written above happened outside of our control. Praise the Lord!
The Lord has now given me a commission to do: to inform people of the little known aspects of the Watchtower Society. This is especially true of the little written about evangelizing methods they employ and the training they receive. The latter things are what transforms people into J.W.s and they then become a danger to others. Mostly I feel very bad for Christians who have had loved ones enter the WTS. They do not understand why and how this has happened. This is one of the aspects I explain in "Knock, Knock: Shedding light on Jehovah's Witnesses at the door." It is in this way that I can offer myself as a true "living proof of Hope." I sincerely hope that you have received some inspiration, hope, or have had your faith strengthened through the trials, tribulations and VICTORIES that I have endured.
GOD BLESSINGS TO YOU AND YOURS!
